| Moral support needed... |
Tue, 22 April 2008 19:30  |
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Hi All,
I just thought I'd post for a little moral support....bear with me while I explain!
Since going through a lot of stuff about a year ago I decided that I'm going to make more of an effort to be more ladylike and elegant in dressing. I have a huge love of all things vintage and so have been enjoying wearing smart clothes to work -50's style in particular pencil skirts, cinch belts etc etc.
As part of this new 'style' for the past few months I've made my first forays in suspender belts and stockings.
Whilst I feel a lot sexier for it i was really upset when on my birthday I treated myself to wearing a pair of FF natural/black seams to work in addition to usual high heels etc. Not only did I not get any appreciative comments but in fact no one mentioned them and I even got abuse from a passing car of hooligans which I won't bother to repeat here.
I'm just a little depressed with my efforts to look more ladylike - my office don't seem to know the meaning of elegant dressing (so its not as though my seams would have been lost admist a sea of stockings) and I just feel that at 26 (as of last week) that nobody seems to really appreciate the effort 
I also want to have a bit of a rant as my boyfriend doesn't seem particularly interested in not only my new image but also the stockings/suspender efforts. As a man of jeans and black t-shirts he doesn't seem to appreciate my efforts other than I 'look lovely' and that he prefers me in black stockings (he doesn't seem to like the seams).
Now my other half isn't a man of many words but I was wondering if the ladies here had any comments regarding particular successes of stocking combinations???
Sorry for the rant but I was just wondering if there are any ladies out there who are also feeling a bit alone in a world of underappreciation for their style???
Would appreciate thoughts.....
Best wishes Vintagebelle xxx
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Tue, 22 April 2008 20:22  |
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Hello, don 't worry, you'll meet real " connaisseurs " that will appreciate the way you dress....my wife did and I'm very proud of her, Michel.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Tue, 22 April 2008 21:19 |
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I can do even better than that, vintagebelle.
My husband has absolutely NO appreciation of stockings, nice underwear or suspender belts at all. Nothing, absolutely nothing.
I could wear a sack to work and he wouldn't make any comments.
You aren't alone.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Tue, 22 April 2008 21:32 |
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I find my man likes the stuff I never expect and is cooler about the stuff I really love  He seems to love one of my corset type things from Ann summers with stockings. It does look great but wouldn't hold up stockings for more than about 5 mins and wriggles its way down every time
Can only suggest trying new combinations to see if a particular thing grabs your mans attention. Other than that just enjoy yourself with dressing up. Even if he doesn't appreciate the outfits I'm sure he'll love the way they make you feel.
Forget the car full of hooligans, idiots without any disernable taste it would seem
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Tue, 22 April 2008 22:18 |
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Hi vintagebelle,don't be so dishearted,there are lot's of men like me who really appreciate the effort's you goto with your choice of clothing and stocking's.
He must be mad not to appreciate and like what you,as his partner are doing for yourself.
One day he might wakeup and smell the coffee,let's hope he does very soon.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Tue, 22 April 2008 23:36 |
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Hi vintagebelle i was interested in your comment about your boyfriend not liking your seamed stockings.
This is my opinion as a fella & please don't be offended.
But when you wear seams all fellas that see you will be impressed if they have a pulse.Your boyfriend may be insecure about this! that's maybe why he prefers you in the non seamed verity as it is,nt as obvious that you're wearing.
Keep it up & do it for yourself don't be upset by other peoples attitude,my wife gets the feeling she is the only Lady that bothers also.
As for the chavs ignore them.
Well that's me finished Nige
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 04:55 |
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Getting a you look lovely from a man of few words is not an easy feat. As long as you feel good about the way you look, dont worry about what other people think. I am also 26 and although my bf is not a stocking lover, he does appreciate them and hold ups and once in a while will compliment certain pairs he likes.
In particular he has liked
Le bourget
http://www.stockingshq.com/shop/product.php?productid=16752;cat=434;page=1
in black
His words for these were...i really like those....ooooh
Aristoc
http://www.stockingshq.com/shop/product.php?productid=16556;cat=419;page=1
in Illusion
His words for these...those look really good on you...yeah those suit you.
Cervins
http://www.stockingshq.com/shop/product.php?productid=16566;cat=420;page=1
http://www.stockingshq.com/shop/product.php?productid=16569;cat=420;page=1
in most colors but i think his favorite is the gazelle. He saw these in a magazine and pointed them out. I confirmed that i had been meaning to get them and he approved.
I like to wear these with either a rago 4 strap cincher in black (one of his favorites) or a rago six strap pull on....another favorite...though he had his doubts at first (he prefers minimal details meaning thin straps and hip rise jeans and belts)...once he saw the belt on, those doubts went out the window
and most recently i had on a pair of blue stockings,....another favorite of his...I believe i was on the phone with my mum so he simply pointed and made motions of approval.
Oh and he really likes a pair of dove grey vintage dior's...however i never wear it becuase i only have one pair!
I hope this helps...but to be honest, some guys are just more vocal or more visually attuned to good taste. Others are turned on by the trashier types of clothing. My wonderful bf happens to have good taste though we differ on nuances. He'll go for one thing and i another in terms of clothing....but in the end i know how to dress myself best and he agrees.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 11:50 |
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Find someone else
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 12:27 |
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Hi there - where do you work / live? If im on business i will pay my respects without doubt inc lunch or dinner!! Seriously there are many devoted nylons fans esp ffn and we just dont see enough of them and i always complement - its not rude at all and most women do appreciate it - keep your chin up and your seams straigh and dont get down
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 12:35 |
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| rocbill942001 wrote on Tue, 22 April 2008 20:22 |
Hello, don 't worry, you'll meet real " connaisseurs " that will appreciate the way you dress....my wife did and I'm very proud of her, Michel.
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Well my wife wears stockings everyday, but hates me liking stockings, she wears them everyday to work but changes into trousers by the time I'm home, I assume in case I "jump" on her.
Go figure. I can't.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 14:31 |
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i reckon if i liked stockings less, my g/f would wear them more!! I am going to keep quiet in the futre I think 
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 14:35 |
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vintagebelle wrote:
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I have a huge love of all things vintage and so have been enjoying wearing smart clothes to work -50's style in particular pencil skirts, cinch belts etc etc.
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This is just my opinion, but if you enjoy wearing these accessories, then maybe you shouldn't care as much what others think. I've seen women dressed elegantly in public and the look on their face tells you that: 1) they know they look good in this, 2)they enjoy wearing these clothes, 3) they realize that most men are attracted to her ensemble, and the men who don't like it, or are indifferent, does not concern her in the least. Obviously, those men wouldn't know elegance if it smacked them in the face, or in the trousers, in this case.
Rawlf
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 14:56 |
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You should celebrate the confidence you displayed to make such a distinct personal fashion statement.
Your confidence, even more than your attractive fashion look, is to be celebrated. 21st Century mores created expectations for everyone to dress, speak and walk the "line" driven by political correctness.
Stroke your confidence with the look that appeals to you. Those that attack your look are really saying, "You should dress like me and everyone else so that you won't remind me that I don't have the confidence to make a personal statement".
doo dah
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 15:08 |
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I cannot believe such men exist, ladies like you should be appreciated.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 15:34 |
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We both think your look sounds fantastic! Can we ask your size(s), or could you post a foto, so we have a better idea of how it all works?
We also agree, that a) he's a moron for not appreciating your classy new look and maybe you should get out and find someone at your "level", b) forget the yobs, that's why they are yobs, c) wear for yourself foremost, d) the office crowd are probably jealous!
Mrs C has worn hold ups to work since forever, and has now converted better than 50% of the workforce there (and they pester her when I bring nice hose home from abroad). She has only recently started wearing stockings and belt on occasion (bump paranoia) - I'm hoping the new 6 strap will help.
Courage! we're sure you look great! J&C
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 16:01 |
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| Sussex nylons wrote on Wed, 23 April 2008 14:31 |
i reckon if i liked stockings less, my g/f would wear them more!! I am going to keep quiet in the futre I think
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tried that, doesn't work. A bit like the don't try it on for a while and they'll soon be "begging for it" - doesn't work either.
I'm married to a cold blooded woman alright.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 17:10 |
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| Quote |
Well my wife wears stockings everyday, but hates me liking stockings, she wears them everyday to work but changes into trousers by the time I'm home, I assume in case I "jump" on her.
Go figure. I can't.
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I can't figure that one out, either, Fingers. Are you a rich man and did your wife marry you for your money? That's the only one I can think of.
Why change into trousers for when you get home, when you like them?
Some spouses are a complete mystery.
I'm married to a tired, sometimes cold blooded, sometimes medium warm man. If I had a barometer for the times when I 'think' he's going to warm up, I'd be alright.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 17:41 |
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Have you asked your spouse what turns them on? I don't mean asking for which body part you should tickle. I mean getting into their heads and understanding what rocks their boat.
My wife and I share a deep understanding of such matters, probably about as deep as it can get. However, we know people who have such awful sex and love lives that we wonder how they carry on.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 18:35 |
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Thanks for so many lovely replies!!!
Its a relief to know that I'm a) not alone and b) there are people out there who appreciate something a bit different and elegant
I have been thinking about expanding my reportoire as so far I'm very limited (unfortunately due to finances) and have been thinking about the Rago range. Thanks for the recommendations by the way.
I had a bit of a catastrophe with holdups as I obviously must have one thigh slightly thinner than the other (I'm sure I don't need to explain) and anyway I quite like the old telltale 'bump' if discreetly discernable.
As to my look I'm size 10-12, 5'8 with a longer leg (irritating when trying to gauge stocking sizes I've found) but I won't be posting photographs!!!
As to the seams thing I hadn't thought my other half might feel a little conscious of them as its more obvious I'm wearing stockings, I might quiz him on that one. I think experimenting with lots of lovely things from SHQ might be a way to get more of a response but its maybe that 'you look lovely' is all I'm going to get so I should be grateful for that compared to a complete lack of response experienced by some fellow posters
I did also have a conversation with a lovely male friend of mine who completely appreciates the way I dress and he pointed out that most men are perhaps a bit scared by an elegant and ladylike look. He thinks I'm oblivious to the appreciative looks I do get so maybe its just me not picking up on it. He did admit that he was terrified to first speak to me because he thought I'd dismiss him out of hand as I was 'so elegant'......Oh the irony huh
Anyway, this has turned into an essay again - thanks for all the responses though and I shall be keeping my chin up and seams straight from now on. And by the way guys, a discreet comment of appreciation goes a huge way so please do if you get the opportunity 
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 18:58 |
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Vintagebelle, please change your settings to allow PMs I've got a note for you!
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 19:48 |
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Don't worry about the length of your posts...it's nice to see someone put proper prose together...
Thanks for the description...we think your style should be well suited to your shape...very 40's 50's (ie shapely, not starved like the models & divas of today).
We can highly recommend the Rago line...Mrs C loves her OBG...and she looks stunning in it (so say I) both in her outfits and out!
May we ask, are you stuck on this fellow (your boyfriend)? The other friend sounds more "with it".
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Wed, 23 April 2008 20:08 |
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Hello vintagebelle,
I appreciated your message very much. It sounds like you are a young lady of esteem, confidence, courage and a shining star of a lovely woman. A cut above the rest I must say! You are truly a remarkable lady. I would suggest to perhaps give your boy/man friend a bit of time to get use to your new look. He may be so taken that he's not really figured out what to say yet. I mean he's spell bound perhaps and lost for the right words. As far as the at work group goes I'd figure this way maybe. You took them by complete surprise! There are some co-workers that love what they saw yet are still lost for words and don't know what to say. There are some that may be green with envy because you have beat them to the punch as far as trying something new. I'm sure many would love to be in your shoes but they have not mustered up the courage to do something new yet. Now you are the pace setter and an example of what many women would love to be. You have proven you can stand on your own two feet and do what pleases you and as long as you are happy that is most important. And as far as the cheeky buggers in the passing car goes if they had a lady for themselves they would not be together keeping each other entertained. Chances are they have failed at any relationship they have been in or tried to be in and were dumped because they are fools. And a fool follows a fool and there was a group of them not even knowing which end is up. In other words they are losers not worthy of your time. I've blabbered enough but I would be happy to help you any way I can.
Susan,
AKA HanesBaby
CSB
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Thu, 24 April 2008 17:36 |
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| Quote |
Have you asked your spouse what turns them on? I don't mean asking for which body part you should tickle. I mean getting into their heads and understanding what rocks their boat.
My wife and I share a deep understanding of such matters, probably about as deep as it can get. However, we know people who have such awful sex and love lives that we wonder how they carry on.
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Tried this. No response. Like talking to a brick wall. I don't think he even knows, can you believe that?
I suppose, after a while being married, you become comfortable with each other and a bit of being taken for granted creeps in.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Fri, 25 April 2008 09:33 |
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Vintagebelle,
It's understandable that you would like an appreciating comment or two from those that work around you on your new elegant way of dressing. We all like those that we work and socialise with to notice any change in our appearance or dress.
There are a couple of problems though from a gentlemans point of view. You have alluded to one and that is the mans confidence. The more attractive the lady the less likely the gentleman to approach, that's just a fact!!!
The other is how the comment will be received in the work place. A seemingly harmless admiring comment suddenly turns into sexual harrassment.
I'm pretty sure that although you may not be getting verbal comments, as your male friend said, you will be getting alot of admiring looks from those around you.
It takes alot of confidence to change the way you dress especially when it's away from the norm.
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| Re: Moral support needed... |
Sun, 04 May 2008 23:30 |
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Sounds to me like your outfits and choices are amazing! I wish my girlfriend had the same attitiude as you, compliments and flowers (plus treats) would be even more forthcoming!
Mark
[Updated on: Sun, 04 May 2008 23:30]
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